The Gossip Rag: Celebrity life, photos, gossip, and news

Fergie dropped her new album, The Dutchess, the other day. Perez Hilton says “Taking a break from the Haterade, we sipped on some Jesus Juice and went out and bought the record. And we love it!!!” Of course, we know he’s probably being paid to write that, because it’s only getting three stars on iTunes right now, with reviews like “Guaranteed to reduce your IQ.”

Would you trust buying a music album for $9.72 when it’s a brand new release?

Weird Al Yankovic just cancelled the release of his new video because it leaked on the internet–specifically YouTube:

The song is a spinoff of Paul Wall’s Riding Dirty and has mildly amusing lyrics:

[Chorus]

They see me mowing my front lawn,
I know they’re all thinking I’m so white and nerdy.
Think I’m just too white and nerdy,
Think I’m just too white and nerdy,
Can’t you see I’m white and nerdy,
Look at me I’m white and nerdy.

I wanna roll with the gangsters,
so far they all think I’m too white and nerdy.
Think I’m just too white and nerdy,
Think I’m just too white and nerdy,
Can’t you see I’m white and nerdy,
Look at me I’m white and nerdy.

[Verse 1]

First here in my class at MIT,
Dice skills, I’m a champion of D&D.
MC Escher, that’s my favorite MC,
Keep your 40, I’ll just have earl grey tea.

My rims never spin, to the contrary,
you’ll find that they’re quite stationary.
All my action figures are cherry,
Stephen Hawking’s in my library.

My MySpace page is totally pimped out,
got people begging for my topic spaces;
I know PI to a thousand places.
Ain’t got grillz, but I still wear braces.

I order all of my sandwiches with mayonaise,
I’m a whiz at minesweeper, I can play for day.
Once you see my score you’ll be amazed,
my fingers moving so fast I’ll set the place ablaze.

I’m a killer app, I haven’t run,
At Pascal I’m number one,
Do vector calculus, just for fun.
I ain’t got a gat, but I got a soldering gun.

Happy days is my favorite theme song,
I can sure kick your butt at Ping Pong,
I’ll ace any trivia quiz you bring on–
I’m fluent in javascript as well as Klingon.

There’s more verses there, but I’ll leave the rest for the comments and update this later!

Tiger Woods: “[the scandal] is unacceptable. I do not accept it.” We thought he said the same thing twice.

Jibbs, some hot new rapstar, has been tearing up the iTunes charts with his new single Chain Hang Low. He’s still in his mid-teens, but his song rocks a dischordant minor power groove on top of innocent kids singing lyrics loosely tied to a dirty playground chant. If nothing else, it’s novel.

Enjoy the music video!

Somehow, adorable starlet Lindsay Lohan managed to fracture her wrist. On Friday, she was rushed to St Vincent’s hospital in New York after falling at a Milk Studios fashion event.

Lindsay Lohan’s publicist, Leslie Sloane Zelnick, warns that the actress’ wrist was fractured in two places when she fell over walking in an outdoor area in flat boots, and that “there’s a pending investigation” and “lawyers are looking into [the situation].”