R Kelly Quote of the Day
“It’s like a rain forest, like Jurassic Park, except I’m your sex-a-saurus baby”
Why is it everytime he opens his mouth and sings, his lyrics are ridiculous and nonsensical?
WoW Night-elf CGI
If you ever wanted your own CGI night elf, say Blizzard WoW style, here’s your chance you gigantic nerd, courtesy of CGI society:
P.S.: It’s ok if you think the night elf is sexy. They are. Now the real trick is going to be trying to find yourself a girlfriend who lets you play WoW. Mine, we raid together.
The Worst Rapper Names: Continued
Cracked has an awesome list of terrible rappers, but they don’t go nearly far enough. They miss a few obvious ones that are definitely worth a laugh. After all, we’ve got 20 years of glorious rap history to paw through, and one post isn’t nearly enough to get all the terribly named rappers!
Beat-n-Azz (aka Mr. Collipark, DJ Smurf, and Michael Crooms)
So, it’s either a blonde dog, a mule accustomed to harsh punishment, or a blue sexless cartoon. I’m not sure why he chose the name for himself, fashioning it after “college park” where he once lived, but it’s clear this rapper can’t spell and doesn’t know much about animal life.
Too Short
It’s bad enough it’s spelled “Too $hort.” But we’re not sure if this rapper is pimping his personal endowment or his height. Modesty in a gangster rapper? Unheard of.
MC Ren
With a real name of Lorenzo Jerald Patterson, we can’t imagine how he came to the Chinese word ren (人) get in his rapper name. Ren literally means “person,” so he is just MC Person. This is ok if you want to be more generic than anybody. Come on, stunt a lil!
Lil’ Keke
The names starting lil’ automatically means a bad start, but Lil’ Keke’s name has been abused by Starcraft players to indicate a ZERG RUSH!!!!!!
Fat Joe
Just because you weight at least 300 pounds does not a rapper make you. And, there’s no reason to put it into your name. Why not something more creative, like “Joe the Crusher,” or even “Juicy Joe” or “Joe Joe.” LOL.
Swizz Beatz
Swizzy, we love you, but even Jon Steward thought you were the manufacturer of “Swiss Beats.” Imported. From Switzerland. It’s just too much ambiguity for our rap-soaked brains to take in all at once.
Celebrity Crimes @ Sundance
Jane Magazine decided to take photos of various stars at Sundance with their favorite crime on a police blotter. It’s quite cute to watch the likes of Kirsten Bell and Josh Hartnett pose:
DJ AM has a sneaker fetish.
Kristin Bell drives like a maniac. And bites!!!
Josh Hartnett likes to take it off. All of it!
Snoop Dogg Denied Visa
Snoop Doggy Dogg has been denied a visa to visit the UK on tour. The poor aging rapper got arrest last year at Heathrow International Airport for causing a “disturbance.”
According to popcrunch, the concert with Puff Daddy, aka P. Diddy, aka Sean Combs, aka Sean John, will continue without Snoop. It takes place at Wembley Arena, London this Tuesday!!